The Story Of A Lil Princess @ Taiwan

I've got a bad feeling about the trip from the beginning but every time it creeps up, i quickly brush it off and told myself it would be alright. After the whole trip, I've learnt that the person that i consider is my friend is indeed not the person i expected her to be. And the guy i have been crushing on has moved on and is not as refined as i thought he would be. Tanti, u were right...I would see traits of him that will make me dislike him but i didn't expect to see him in this light. Not this way. It was painful to watch him chat on the phone for hours while we were all out and about. And i had to help him shop for her.


I felt so used, so just filling up the space, so out of place within the group. Clearly we're from different worlds and it's a lesson for me to learnt. I hope the next time i ever decide to join them in any activity, i will think of all the awful experience i went through in this trip. I hope i never have to experience this ever again. And I'm so disappointed how someone can be that shallow? Doesn't she have any dignity to decide for herself and how can someone of that age behave so kiddish? *sigh*.....


Aside with the horrible things that happened. I went for the biggest shopping spree ever in my entire life. I was literally walking by shops n grabbing things off the rack and just asking for a new piece and stuffing it into my bag. Then walk to the next shop and the same process repeats itself. This past 2 months has such an impact on my bank account...the trip, birthdays, shopping, food..... I'm going to have to be very prudent from now till end of the year but i still wanna get my camera!! How?!?! I wish there's some bonus or increment now :(


Back to the trip, I've never walked so much in my life. I am so not exaggerating. My legs hurt so bad that i was limping by the end of each day and when i got back home, my legs & feet swelled up. It looked like some preggers woman's feet.



Day One
We've touched down and was rudely surprised that our budget hotel looked so dingy looking and so not like the pics we saw.... It was very bad. Anyway we got ready to head into Dan Shui for food and shopping. We stopped by at Xin Bei Tou for hot spring and the hike up the hill to the hot spring area was tiring. I was ready to retire for the day. Anyway that was tiring enough we had to go to Dan Shui to fullfill some typical chinese thing about visiting Dan Shui - the lovers bridge. What a waste of my leg muscle and energy. Clearly it was getting very late and our legs hurt from all the walking but someone insisted on getting to that place. We could have a rode bikes but she was kicking a fuss about not knowing how to ride a bike... So what?? He offered to carry you didn't he? Argh ~! Such a drama-mama. Then just when i thought i can finally head back to Taipei city to our hotel, we spotted a bustling street across the road. They wanted to go walk the street... OMG. We went in and the street snacks were bursting and we stopped for someone but i didn't get to eat any because food depreived M was literally stuffing it down his throat. So not a classy look. *disgusted*


Day Two
We woke up around 8.30am to take the train down to Tai Chong. We were going to the Star Villa for a night. The room we got was absolutely beautiful. The Villa was gorgeous. I would definately go back there again... with better company of course. The rooms were named after each horoscope and it was managed by this old couple. The look so happy.... i wish i would grow old like them. We unloaded our stuff and walked out to look at the sheeps. Something she insisted. What is so cute about sheeps?? I had to climb up 487 stairs and up n down n up n down hills. Just to see some stupid smelly sheeps. Then we had the option to take the bus ride back to our villa, they kept asking if i want to wait for the bus when i clearly declared i wanted to take the bus as my feet hurts. How can they be so inconsidered? I am also part of the group and they should let me do the things i wanna do at times too right? In the end unhappily i walked with them back down n up n down n up the hill and down 487 steps. By the time we got back to the Villa i just plonk myself down in the patio and cam whore cos she was no where to be seen. Tucked in some corner romancing themselves or something. M was so busy talking to the mysterious person on the phone. *disgusted* Then after dinner, they wanted to go to the Swiss Garden which i decided to pass. Smarties me.


Day Three
We made our way down hill and back to the train station. Wasn't feeling very well cos she was snoring and hogging the blanket the whole night. Then not to mention so full from breakfast, we had a taxi driver from hell. Driving so fast that made me feel so sick. By the time we got back to Taiper City, I was all good. On this day we went to the CKS Memorial Centre... suppose to be the landmark/icon of Taiwan. I just waited up front while they walked in to snap away their pictures. Then we went to the Long Shan Temple. I've asked the Gods if i would be with someone by the end of 2009 .... NO. Is M the one for me .... YES.
Well it's just an indication.... Not going to live my life by it. Then we get back to Xi Men Ding to eat and shop.


Day Four
Almost the last day. We have to spend all our money today. It's now or never. We woke up early and headed to Jiu Fen for the morning. Walked around and snacked a lot... but obviously, i can never keep up with them. It's like they have a bottomless stomach. After that we took the bus back down to the city and walked a long bit to Taipei 101 for more pics. I lingered for a while while they take their pics and headed into the mall first. Then we walked around looking for the Le Sport Sac shop but i guess it closed down already. We were going to take a cab to Wu Fen Pu but she wanted to stop for food at 7-11. Again can't keep up with their tummies. Can so see them eating down my share. Finally made our way to the shopping street and that's when all the madness came. I kept buying and buying and buying and ended up with sore feet at the end of the night. Well it was after this that really drew the last straw. I'm so disappointed she reacted the way she did and so selfish of her.
Finally got back to the hotel and starting my catalogueing and packing. Finally went to bed at 3.15am... woke up at 3.45am to leave to the airport.


Day Five
Arrived at the airport and i was so in a zombie mode. Had to sit on flight all alone :( Tough luck and unlucky friends i have.

I am still recovering from the trip. Very tired and body still aching all over. Slowly distributing the gifts to friends and family.

Khalil Fong - Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You

I Feel

You've got me up in a bunch :(

I feel so disposable.

I feel so unwanted.

I feel so second choice.

I feel so taken for granted.

I feel so ignored.

I feel so used.

I feel so broken.

I feel so stucked.

I feel so lost.

I feel so abandoned.

I just feel so ..... sad cos i actually like you.

Serendah - Post

It's my first time camping and I'm glad i decided to start it off in luxury style camping. I don't think i could survive in the wild. i would be the first one to go down!! We arrived and the place was beautiful.... calming soothing kinda beautiful but filled with mosquitoes. You don't even realize they bite you till you are bitten which is already too late. We unpacked was warmly greeted by our neighbour in the other glass shed. And some how a huge green monster decided to take over the command ship :( I'm so not proud of my actions at that moment. I was such a sour grape, out of line and immature.
*the following was typed on my borrowed ipod touch as there was no reception or technology whatsoever in the jungle*

Day 1
Almost 7pm and we're waiting for her friends to come. I need to move on and let him go. M : What is so charismatic about you? Why do I get so jealous? You're not mine to begin with. It's none of my business but I still feel the pinch when it happens. It's like a huge green monster that has swallowed me. I'm suppose to act cool and should have managed to forget you. I'm SUPPOSED to have moved on!!! I’m sorry I fell for you...

Day 2
Just had breakfast about an hour ago. It wasn't hot but hey, it's better than preparing my own breakfast right? I think I feel a lot cooler with them checking out the next door girls now cos I didn't turn into a green monster this time. Good achievement right? Anyway this weekend is just going to be like the other all the other weekend. Not going to have any hope/jalan so not point disappointing myself.

After that we packed up and managed to load the stuff into the car just in time before the rain came. We paid up and headed for Hulu Yam for lunch. After lunch "Jason" moved over to our car and M moved back to seat with me. Was he too tired to drive his own car or .... ? Well i won't complain cos i think that was the highlight of my trip :) That moment, i give it 5 stars !! And upon arriving back in KL, i have something exciting and scary to do.... and that requires a post of it's own...

Serendah - Pre

The few days before Serendah's camping + BBQ was tiring. Lotsa unexpected meetings and long days away from my computer. Firstly, I had to take emergency leave on Monday as the little rascal wasn't feeling well. Then i had to prepare for an impromptu meeting with the clients and creatives on Wednesday. My energy level was half empty already by then. Then a full day training for the Basic 1-ers was killing my legs. Sure there were moments when i felt like killing SI but she's deep down stressed out over running the whole event by herself and she's overly motherly and controlling to begin with.... so i can't complain. Then after a long day running around in my 4 inch heels and being bossed around, i had to return to the office to prepare for the next day's meeting.

To top it all off, i had to cancel half of my leave on Friday cos of a lousy meeting with the client. It was so boring and all communicated in chinese (mand and canto). Ok finally noon arrived and we excused ourselves. Quickly dropped my colleague back at her place and i dash back home. One cos of a mini wardrobe emergency and the other cos M was coming to pick me soon....Excited and nervous at the same time for this weekend. Got home, got ready and waited for M to reply. He must still be at the gym cos he didn't reply till an hour later. Got my things out of the house and carried it all the way down and by this time, my stomach was no longer rumbling now and then but it's like this constant churning sound already. I quickly grab some biscuits cos i don't want a rumbling tummy with just me and M in the car. The minute i saw him, hahaha... everything came rushing back. The past few weeks of moving on just went out the window.

We went for lunch and waited for birthday girl. All in all, we left for Serendah at 5pm. Haha.....why did i even bother to take a day off or even rushed from the meeting this morning right? Will post about the camp + BBQ in another post.

Not Meant To Be

I had an expensive weekend. I blew almost RM500 (sat & sun) and signed almost RM2K worth of debt :( Sigh.... when month ends comes, i'm gonna be so damn broke. My bank account is crying blood now. I had my first fine dining experience and it wasn't a date. What a loser life i have. Then i went clubbin' which reinforces my dislike for clubbin' all over again. What the hell is so nice about rubbing yourself against weird ass looking people. I've never been molested so much in my life before. I arrived home almost 3am, almost deaf and smelly. Even after showering, my hair still smell like ciggies. So damn smelly but i was too tired to care.


The next morning i went to the temple to pray - a special celebration. Then went to meet up with my friends for lunch. Non meat lunch for me... was suppose to be a vegetarian for the day. Then after they left, i walked around and had a chat with my expensive taste friend. Plus he earns so much more than me and he's happily spending his money on all the things he likes. I wish to be like him too. The grass is always greener on the otherside of the fence. Then met up dinner with another friend and drinks.


Work has been pouring in today like a broken pipe. Trying to finish it but so no mood.

2 things are swimming in my mind : my hair and M. What to do what to do what to doooooo

Theory Of A Deadman - Not Meant To Be

The First Cut Is The Deepest

This is indeed the deepest and therefore will be leaving one of the biggest mark in my life.... my first serious attempt at documenting my thoughts, ramblings, feelings, frustrations or simply a place to speak my mind and blow off some steam. I wonder if i should import my old entries from my previous blog or have a clean start? Still thinking.....maybe I'll go explore the import thingy later and see if it's possible, then I'll decide?? It took me a week to settle with this alias. Hoping to remain anonymous all the way but I'm sure some ppl around me *yes I'm referring to u* and good friends know who am i. Just for laughs, amongst some of the screen names i was playing around was : Wonder Woman, WWWoman (stands for whoopsie wonder woman), Maybe Baby and ......


Anyway I've decided.... i shall end all of my entries with a song. It may be a song playing in my mind or maybe a song that sings about all the things i really wanna say. Have you ever felt like somehow those singer/song writer happen to produce/write/sing the song that describes your current state of mind/feelings at the exact moment? For instance, right now.... when you feel like giving up on somebody and falling for that somebody was an unexpected thing. Thus the song - Knock You Down by Keri Hilson. I think the part where she sings : "Sometimes love comes around and it knocks you down, just get back up when it knocks you down" is so spot on or "I never thought I'd fall for you as hard as I did". So am i suppose to get back up and continue to chase pavements ?? I think a week ago, i was looping Chasing Pavements by Adele. Self doubting if i should give up or keep going after something that is 99.9% most probably not happen? No expectations, no regrets..... easier said than done. I tell my friends this but i can't seem to make myself do it.


*almost lost my entry... cos the Internet f*ucked up* I can't remember what else i wrote but anyway I'm going to post it now. Will post other ramblings after my big act at 4.30pm. Wish me luck !!